slap_the_butt | (no subject)

[All in all, Kurt's relieved Thanksgiving is over. He enjoyed getting to spend that time with his family, but the truth is, all he's wanted to do lately is curl up on his bed and mope. The breakup wasn't just Blaine's idea. Kurt ultimately thought it was the best way to save their friendship too, and it ended up being a mutual decision. But it still hurts. He still feels raw and sad, and he doesn't think those feelings are going to go away for a while. There's still a part of him that wants to call Blaine up and ask to try again; Kurt ruined someone's life just so they'd have a chance to make their relationship work and this is how it ends?

But he doesn't call Blaine. He doesn't do much of anything once the holiday and Black Friday is over. He just lies in his bed, staring up at the ceiling, debating calling the girls so they can come over with comfort food. But he's not sure he's in the mood to explain things, and the room doesn't just belong to him anymore anyway, and he doesn't want to bother Older Kurt. In fact, between his recent breakup and the bizarre feelings he's been having around Older Kurt lately, he's not sure how to even look him in the eyes. Why does life have to be so complicated?] Why is this my life?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Kurt shrugs a little bit, still tracing a slow little pattern on Little Kurt's stomach with his fingertips. Personally, Kurt can see where this is going. Little Kurt wants to be with him, and honestly, despite how confusing this is, Kurt can see himself being with Little Kurt someday too. Once he's deflated a bit, released some of his pent up worries and frustrations and fears, once he's had time to move on and try again. He gets Little Kurt. He gets him and his worries and fears, and if he can turn out to be a pillar of support and understanding and love for him, then he'll more than happily be that. The sex is just something that comes with it, if they want it to.]

I care about you. I want to have sex with you. I hope you want to have sex with me. We can, but we don't have to. I'm just saying that if it's something you want, no matter what we are, don't be afraid to let me know.

[Kurt stares up at the ceiling, trying to get his thoughts together. He knows what he wants, but knowing the right way to get to that isn't so easy. He wants to be with Older Kurt. He wants to have a relationship and a future with him. But there's this fear inside him that having sex while they're trying to figure things out will complicate and ruin everything. Kurt knows he could fall in love with Older Kurt, he wants to. But he doesn't want it to happen before they're both ready to deal with it. And sex? It confuses things.]

I care about you too, and I--I want to have sex with you. I really want to have sex with you. But I don't want to risk messing up what we could have together by moving too fast. We should do this right.

[Kurt smiles fondly into his chest and nods, cuddling closer still. He's absolutely right. As much as he'd love to have sex with Little Kurt some more, they really should wait if they want to make this work. The more patient they are, the sweeter the fruits of their effort and dedication will be. Besides, as a wise man once said, this is why they invented masturbation.]

You're right.

[He leans forward to press a soft kiss to Older Kurt's cheek. It feels good knowing Older Kurt gets it, that he seems to understand. It might not be much yet, but he feels like they're at a pretty good start.]

So... until we have things figured out, friends? A-and once we do figure things out, if you still want me by then, we'll probably have a lot to talk about.

[The kiss earns him a lazy grin, and Kurt happily wraps his arms around Little Kurt's narrow frame, tangling their legs together, holding him close. As sweaty and gross as he's starting to feel, he doesn't want to move an inch. He's very comfortable where he is right now.]

Friends. Lots to talk about. Mmm-hmm.

[His smile widens and grows bright as Older Kurt wraps his arms around him and tangles their legs. It feels nice, being in his arms like this, and it almost makes him want to take back everything he said about waiting. Maybe it'll be alright for them to be like this at least until morning. Kurt has just lost his virginity after all, and it would a be shame not to get to spend the night in the arms of his potential future boyfriend. They will have to get up long enough to get clean eventually, but it can wait for now.]

And maybe once things are figured out, we could, um, date? [He ends the question with a light kiss to the corner of Older Kurt's mouth.] And about that party I mentioned earlier...

Edited 2011-11-29 12:35 (UTC)

Mmm-hm. [Kurt returns the little kiss to the corner of his mouth with a little noise of agreement, eyes still closed, more than happy to remain lying there with Little Kurt's warm body against his own. It wouldn't surprise him if he fell asleep like this. He cracks his eyes open as Little Kurt brings up the party, smiling fondly at him.] What about it?

[He presses a kiss to the other corner of Older Kurt's mouth, and then right on the lips, his hand going up to brush through his hair before pulling back to smile at him.] I think you should let me and Finn throw the party.

[And Kurt returns every little kiss with a pleased hum, leaning into the gentle touch to his hair. Everything's so warm and cozy and lazy right now. He loves this. He offers Little Kurt a soft chuckle.] Why would I stop you to begin with?

[He slides his fingers through Older Kurt's hair lazily, giving him a small shrug and a smile.] Because it requires you to take responsibility of two teenage boys, and as far as Dad and Carole are concerned, it would be up to you to keep us out of trouble while they're gone? And because you didn't say anything when I brought it up earlier.

I've gone drinking with kids younger than you two. I think I can handle you. [He chuckles softly, eyes on Little Kurt, taking in the lines of his face and the color of his eyes. Their eyes really are amazing. They look so much better from here than in the mirror.] That's because I thought you might do something stupid if you got to throw a party. Plus you mentioned some mystery crush, I just couldn't stay away from juicy gossip like that.

I'm not a kid. And I'm sure you can handle us, but that doesn't necessarily mean you'd want to. [His cheeks grow warm at the way Older Kurt's looking at him and he leans into to kiss him again, letting it last a little longer this time. He's really going to miss this come tomorrow morning.] ...What made you think I'd do something stupid? If you recall, I was one of the only sober, responsible people at Rachel's train wreck last year. And anyway, I'm not sure I'm going to allow alcohol if we have a party here.

[He laughs.] So did the gossip turn out to be as juicy as you thought it would be?

Well, I want to. [He returns the kiss, humming softly against his lips. Honestly, if he got to choose, they wouldn't have to give this up tomorrow morning. But Little Kurt thinks being friends would be the best course of action for now, and he won't make him do something he thinks might be a bad idea just so they can have this for a while longer. It's not his choice. He's going to miss this too.] You just broke up with your boyfriend and you were kind of freaking out for a while back there. I'd do something stupid on purpose at a party if I were in your position.

More than I'd ever imagine, actually.

That's great! I promise we won't make you regret it. [Right about now, Kurt thinks that whatever will get them to a stable romantic relationship the easiest, without the potential to get messy later is the best course of action, and he knows that if they keep sleeping together, he'll get attached. He'll fall for him and he'll be crushed if Older Kurt doesn't fall back. So this is him playing it safe just as much as it's him trying to be logical.] Did you think I was going to try to get him back or something? The truth is, I think a party would be good for my campaign.

Mm, I'm really glad to hear it. I'd hate to think my feelings for you make for bad gossip.